Over the past week K and I have given some thought to some new rules, expectations and rewards for Wifey. One significant change is that there will be the opportunity each week for Wifey to earn light punishment, severe punishment and also rewards, but punishments, unless there are multiple severe ones, will not result in loss of rewards earned. All rewards will now be in the form of intimacy with me. Depending on the amount of good things done to put towards rewards will depend how much intimacy with me. This can include things like being allowed to French kiss me, lick my to orgasm, lick my asshole, or maybe even eat a cream pie from me. On our older system, rewards were seldom earned, but I don’t want the tedious silly things Wifey does on the naughty list to ruin her chances to have that special connection time with me. I also like the fact that this is designed so he can control how many weeks she gets to have something intimate with me, by her behavior, so the choice is hers. If that special connection time with me is important to her then she will make sure she hits her mark every week!
The expectations that can lead to the minor punishments (usually the reddened ass kind) will be things like keeping the stove clean, putting away clean dry dishes (K actually has been doing the majority of the dishes), but also washing the dishes if he (we) are not able to, refilling ice-cube trays, making sure laundry is done to our standards, taking trash out timely, and saying her mantra on her hands and knees. There are a few other things, but you get the idea.
The ways Wifey will start earning more severe punishments are if we find she is not embracing a positive attitude about herself and others. Wifey tends to spend more time in a negative head space than a positive one, and I need that to change for her sake and mine. If she does not communicate maturely and directly, that will be another way. Sometimes Wifey bottles things up till she explodes with outbursts that are hurtful and emotionally damaging, all because she does not say what is on her mind, despite how she knows that communication is vital. If you are wondering, this is not pertaining to our threesome, but more her struggling feelings of wanting to be more female. There is a lot emotionally to figuring out you are a transgender and should have been in the other body, but being in a life where you lived as the opposite sex so long, and an outing would probably damage your family relationships and work ones. Among a couple other things, forgetting to say her mantra to us multiple times a week will also result in a harsher punishment. I feel this mantra, which we have tried a long time to have, and Wifey was extremely inconsistent with, is an important part of our day. It makes me feel special each day when Wifey recommit herself to me (us). The other big one, which has become an issue over the last few months, is that when we are talking to Wifey, about anything of substance, I expect her to put her phone or iPad down and actually look at us. This annoys me to no end, and in this day and age almost all of us use these devices for so many things, that it is easy to get absorbed into them and forget when it is actually downright rude and counter productive to your close relationships, to be on them!
The ways Wifey will earn rewards (special intimate time with me) is by doing things like having a positive attitude, presenting us ideas and ways for her to feel more girly without medication or pills, which is not realistic for our life, finding locations we can travel to that are within a 2-3 hour radius from home for weekend getaways for us all so she can be fully fem and we can all enjoy new areas, doing extra housework not on the normal list of small things, doing sweet things for us, surprising us, offering back rubs, foot rubs, and saying the mantra daily with a heartfelt manner.
One common thing in the past is that Wifey feels we are just out to get her. This isn’t really the case, and honestly sometimes I have felt like it is just an excuse not to try harder, but this will remove that notion from her mindset, because unless she racks up so many naughty things, we will not take away her rewards for the good things. Wifey is a very thoughtful person normally, and until she struggled with the loss of a special family member this year as well as her growing emotional struggle with her own body, she normally is a very upbeat person, excited about life. I am hoping that these new expectations will help her get past this and be back to being the Wifey we know and love! It is probably a conclusion most would jump to when you live in this dynamic and there is an emotional change, that it must be the dynamic that is the issue, but after hours and hours and hours of communication, that is not the case, it is just that wanting to live in the body you were not born into is emotionally difficult!